Yes, trust me, I thought we were done too, and I was happy in that place. Amie and I were online Sunday looking for a new cell for me, since mine is almost two years old and struggling to make it through each day. (I just LOVE the original LG EnV! Don’t want to retire it! 
) So I logged into my Wireless online account because I get corporate discounts at Verizon through Constellation. Amie helps me decide on a new phone and I check my bill on the way out to see how many minutes I’ve used. I have no clue, because my AmEx autopays my Verizon bill each month, among several other bills. Yay for technology! I don’t have to remember stuff that I inevitably always forget!
$219.99 for “Unreturned merchandise”??? What is this crap? First issue: I DID return it. Second issue: it was a broken $79.00 modem. Why did I get this charge? Are they playing games with me?
So I call them up and a nice man named James offers to help me out. 30 seconds on hold with no awful music and he returns to inform me that FedEx says I’m a liar. (Well, they didn’t call me a liar, but they told him I never sent the package back.) He tells me sometimes the warehouse will get packages in but won’t be sure to update the individual account, so if I can provide the tracking info, we can all sort this out. Here’s essentially how the conversation went from there.
James: “Where did you mail the broken modem back to?”
Jen: “Um. I didn’t take note of the destination on the FedEx return label that Verizon provided me to use to mail the broken modem back with. I assume it was one of your warehouses.”
Jen is thinking: “Verizon provided me a label to use to mail the modem back to Verizon. And Verizon is now asking me which Verizon address they would have used. Isn’t this information that Verizon should have on file somewhere? “
James: “Ah, yes, it should have gone to a warehouse. Do you know if it was addressed to ‘New Breed’?”
Jen: “I’ll be honest with you, this was two months ago, and I really don’t remember. Someone at Verizon created the FedEx label for me to use to send it back, so I guess I just I assumed you guys would have put your correct address on it.”
James: “Well, our warehouse doesn’t show that it came back. Sometimes they’ll get something in but just not update your account. FedEx is also showing that they never received a package. Do you have that tracking number?”
Jen is thinking before she responds: “Okay, I can see how a warehouse grunt made one mistake that day at work and it just so happens to affect me. I can forgive the grunt. BUT… how does James know that FedEx didn’t move my package if he doesn’t have the tracking number that he is now asking me for? And why is he asking me for a tracking number when Verizon created the return label, not me??? I’d think Verizon should keep better track of the FedEx labels they’re creating. Their accountants or auditors must go crazy…”
Jen: “I’m at work right now, so it may be at home. But why wouldn’t you have that on file if Verizon created the FedEx return label for me?”
James: “Well, I’m not sure who creates those. But it’s a good idea to write down the tracking numbers for situations like this.”
Jen is thinking: “Great, I’ll log that away in my memory for the next time I mail back faulty equipment using a return label created by the company itself. But that can’t be the only solution.”
Jen: “I do that when I create shipments myself, but I assumed that Verizon would keep track considering the FedEx charge eventually has to be linked back to my account for audit purposes. Is there no other way to find out where the box went?”
James: “Well, do you remember where you mailed it from?”
Jen: “Of course, the post office downstairs in our building.”
James: “Great. Then you can just call up FedEx and ask them to track a package that you mailed from that address on that day and they should be able to help you. If it turns out that the package was lost, they’ll reimburse you the amount and you’ll forward that to us so we can remove from your bill. I’m sorry I can’t help more with that, but you have to work directly with FedEx.”
Jen is thinking: “Alright buddy, you asked if I knew WHERE I mailed it from. Not WHEN. I don’t have a clue what day I dropped the box in the FedEx bin! Do you keep track of the date and location when you mail off your water bill? Prolly not… And I KNOW right now you can’t tell me the address your water bill went to!
And another thing… I am NOT interested in convincing FedEx that their lost package results in them mailing me a $220 check for me to forward to you. I’ll be adding a fee to that for my time and inconvenience.”
Jen: “So if I find my tracking # and we can figure out that my package did indeed come back to the warehouse, you’ll remove the charge from my account, correct?”
James: “Yes ma’am.” And then he asks me if he was able to fix my problems today to the best of his ability, blah blah.
Ugh. So I’m contemplating claiming fraudulent charges to my AmEx card, wondering how to get this all sorted out to my benefit when I stumble over the return tracking # in my “Mail to be Filed” stack. Hmm. Guess I was smart enough to keep it after all, guess I thought it was a good idea to write down the tracking numbers for situations like this.
Stay tuned to find out who gets the nasty phone call, FedEx or Verizon. 
